Hello, current and potential students. I'm going to drop some important news on you.
You might want to sit down for this. Are you sitting? Could you please just do it for dramatic effect? Listen, I don’t care if you’re reading this at your grandmother’s funeral, the fact that you chose to read this at her funeral shows you don’t have much tact so sitting down shouldn't be that much of an issue for you.
You're sitting, right?
Thank you.

